(More unfortunate words were never spoken) I decided to offer a free three hour block of time to whomever named the cadre of under-performing queries we’re going to be looking at as part of my SQLBits precon.
For my @SQLBits precon, I have seven queries with very tricky problems.
They sniff, they spool, they defraud, they steal, they push, and generally run amok.
If you come up with a cunning name for this septet of villainy, you’ll win three free hours of consulting time with me.
— Erik Darling Data (@erikdarlingdata) January 31, 2019
This is fair. I have no idea how to use MARS.
Seven Deadly Spids
— Peter Shore (@pshore73) January 31, 2019
This might be too painful for anyone to endure.
— Andy Mallon ? (@AMtwo) January 31, 2019
Said every front end dev everywhere
Seven reasons to be a front end dev
— James Anderson (@DatabaseAvenger) January 31, 2019
Well, I do have some ideas for SQL Server…
“The Spills Have Eyes”
— Joe Sack (@JoeSackMSFT) January 31, 2019
Rob kindly overestimates my ability to retain information.
Seven Sneaky SQL Server Samples, Showing Solicitous Solutions
— Rob Volk (@sql_r) January 31, 2019
Open To Everyone
If you’re not on Twitter, not following me, or just missed it in the sea of having better things to do, leave a comment with your idea.
I do occasionally like blog comments.
Thanks for reading!
If this is the kind of SQL Server stuff you love learning about, you’ll love my training. I’m offering a 75% discount on to my blog readers if you click from here. I’m also available for consulting if you just don’t have time for that and need to solve performance problems quickly.